Since childhood, I've been possessed by the ambition to be a knight.
I mean... I delighted in imagining situations in which I was condemned to a violent death. Something like the desire to experience permanent pain, a sorrow that tormented my body; a sensation akin to self-denial, intimacy...
the weakness my heart felt for death, night, and blood was undeniable.
this sounds so familiar...
but you can't remember exactly what it reminds you of.
you put the photo in your pocket and turn to leave